You Win.

I know I shouldn't.

It's been so long, 

So, so, so long,

Since I've needed you.

And I was proud

And I was happy

And I was new

But you fit so well,

So neat, warm, in my hand

Snug between my fingers

Who knows,

One day when I need you,

Really, really need you,

You might kill me.

But that's it, isn't it?

Addiction.

It's just so strong.

Stronger than me

Than hope

Light

Love.

Because you're still here.

Ha,

Clung on,

You nasty little thing;

Concealed,

Waiting,

But I found you.

So weak

So, so weak

Now burning,

Anger,

Shame,

Regret,

Fear, 

Oh, crippling fear,

It's what you live off,

You call me out,

And I oblige -

Again,

And again,

And again.

Each time the last,

Each time just once more.

But I'll beat you one day.

You'll leave me forever;

Sweet independence,

I'll be clean,

I'll be free,

I'll be myself.

I'll win.

The End

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