My Own Private Hell

I pass the homes of all the families
who bask in the love of each other
just as I contemplate hitting the bottle
and letting go of yet another empty day

I don’t know how to live anymore
as the agonising memories hasten my collapse
let me grab the gun and push it to my head
You will never miss who was never expected

Can’t find a way out of my private Hell
because I can’t tell the difference between
who made me smile and who bought me pain
Guess the bottle is the only way

I saw her again yesterday, walking around town
but she looked straight through me
My scars have faded but my skin has faded chalk white
I wonder if she even knew who she was looking at

I keep to the streets because I don’t want to go home
where nothing waits for me except the threat of tomorrow
But nothing lines my pockets except my last twenty
maybe that liquor store will be open at this hour

 Can’t find a way out of my private Hell
because I can’t tell the difference between
who made me smile and who bought me pain
Guess the bottle is the only way

The End

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