Will You Ever Know?

To the guy that raped me: You're the worst best friend in the entire world. Kthanksbye.

It seems no matter what I do, you'll never be satisfied
And no matter what I say, you'll always think I lied
Like it doesn't matter how I paint it, I won't be tall
Enough to cover up the writing on the wall
The words, they burn holes through my shirt
Setting my skin aflame with their truth
Their lies cool the fiery youth
These writings on my wall are true
Yet they're false, because they're words suffocate me
I'm suffocting, can't you see me?
If I'm not good enough after all this time
What makes you worth all of mine?
Why must I imagine you prior to the whiskey
Why do you still have such a hold on me?
I still drink to sleep
When you pop up in my dreams
I inhale the smoke whenever I see
Your picture on your Facebook, all up in my news feed
And I can't delete, becaue then I won't suffer
I guess I want to know I can still feel for
You, unlike you for me
Bit by bit, I'm breaking down
Only to be held up by the fact you knocked me down
And I want to defy you
With everything I am, I want to bind you
To me, to my pain, so you can feel everything
Do you feel the terror as you move my body
Can you feel the shock as you 'whip it out' and shove it in me?
Will you ever know what you did to me?

The End

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