were you there
your gaze burns my face
from across the room.
I can tell what you're looking for,
but how can I tell you
it isn't me?
My fingers are made of feathers,
my legs tremble with each step,
I'm a bird who never learned to fly,
a mermaid in search of a tail,
while you profess fairy tales,
I turn away.
"Forever," you press your lips to my neck
"I will be yours forever.
I've been with you for always.
Never will I leave your side."
But I know too much to believe
your liquid lullabies.
I know it's just another part of your game
to score a night, to win me for a date,
but I'm not so naive.
You see the scars on my hands,
and tell me "No,
girl, if you were with me, you wouldn't have
to hurt anymore."
And I look at you with fire in my eyes,
as if you could repair this damage.
Were you there
when a man who promised me
the love of a father,
took from me
what I did not wish to give.
Were you there
when the boy who had professed to love me
forced himself into my body
because I would not give up
everything for him.
Were you there
when I knelt on the floor,
vision blurred with sleeping pills
arms and hands seeping blood
from all the sorrow spilled.
And still, I found will to live,
to go on,
to smile,
without a man holding my hand every mile.
How can you pretend to know me
and tell me what is right
when you can only limp in the shoes
I've sprinted in
my whole life.
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