Wanna-Be Savior

I am a wanna-be savior.

I feel the need to help.
I feel the need to be the answer.
I feel the need to take on burdens.
I am a wanna-be savior.

Guilt is my friend when I don't think of other's.
Condemnation when I talk about my struggles.
Sadness when I can't relate.
I am a wanna-be savior.

If I can't help, shame on me!
If I don't say the right thing, worthless I!
When I don't notice that look in the eyes, what worth am I?
I am a wanna-be savior.

I'll make myself relate, go ahead just a little bit.
Dive head first into this crazy game.
But soon I'll spin out of control. 
I am a wanna-be savior.

"Hold on, just wait a minute! 
I'll hold you, don't cry!
Me? *hesitate* Don't worry I'm just fine."
I am a wanna-be savior.

But I'm going down inside.
This crazy tugging game is wearing me out within. 
I don't know how much farther I can make it.....but never you mind!
I am a wanna-be savior.

If I can't save you, searing guilt in my mind.
I'll contain the continual fear within, that I didn't speak the right thing. 
The proper thing to save your skin. 
I am a wanna-be savior.

Think of yourself, they say.
But HA! 
Do they know what they are asking me to do?

Selfish, selfish, selfish girl! 
How DARE you think of yourself?
How DARE you refuse to fully help??
I am a wanna-be savior......

It's a compulsion, a lifetime career.
I take the backseat, I take the rear. 
It sucks the very life and soul from my heart.
I am a wanna-be savior.

I'm going numb now.
Because I can't help anybody anymore.
I don't have anything left within me, I am empty. 
I am a wanna-be savior.

I can't fix what is broken.
I can't save what is lost.
But I can't give up.
I have failed at being a savior.


But there is a God.

That is called Savior.

Who comes down and gently reminds me.

"Darling, my beautiful darling,

You have no place to save.

I am called Savior, I save that which is lost.

And you are very lost.

In this game of being a savior.

I can fix what is broken. 

I can save what is lost. 

I will never give up.

Won't you let me be your savior?

I will save those you love.

I promise."


So from now on, I'll let him do the saving.
He has saved me, and he will do the same for those I love. 
I don't have to pretend.
I don't need to be a savior.

The End

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