Unlucky thirteen/die in my sleep

This was inspired by 'Enter Sandman' by Metallica.


Most people would love to die
in their sleep,

They could slip away,

No pain,

As if they’d been unplugged,

It scares me,

I don’t want to die in my

Mid-nightmare, maybe on the
verge of waking up,

Like trying to sit up but
being kicked back down,

As if the bullies that have
tortured you for your whole life,

Returned at death to repeat
the playground ritual,

One last time,

Maybe you’re not outwardly in
turmoil, seemingly dying in peace,

But inside you are repeating
your nightmare,

Back as a thirteen-year-old

Where you were “too young to
have opinions” and “too young to feel so strongly”

Where the injury was deliberate,

Either by you or another,

Maybe as you die in your sleep
you relive all your worst memories,

And a meager slideshow of
happiness or none at all,

Back to unlucky thirteen

Where you sat in a cubicle
staring at a knife, a compass, a razorblade, a random box of tablets,

Wondering, if you’d be brave

And what they’d say when they
found you,

Would they snigger and say “that
did it!”

Would they mourn their
punch-bag and plaything?

Irked by the need to find and
train another,

You never were brave enough…

There’s still time,

I think I’d like to go to

If heaven is where they
forgive you for making thirteen unlucky,

As long as you claim to be

Cursed are those who hunger
and thirst for righteousness,

For they shall be starved,

And wither like lilies,

In the heat of mortal hell,

Everyday life,

I won’t die in my sleep,

Unless sleep-suicide exists,

Alongside sleep-talk and walk,

Tonight I will open
unlucky-thirteen’s scars,

Nobody can save me from

The End

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