I thought there would be peace.
I thought I would be at rest with myself.
I thought that magically everything would work out.
I thought I would love myself.
Like a fairy tale, or a movie of some such.
Within a simple twenty-four hours.
How could I let myself raise my hopes?
It has sunken me so low.
Will I ever raise my head up again?
I hold back the tears, telling myself I'm strong.
But I'm dying inside.
And I can't stop this agony.
I never want to hope again.
Hope has let me down.
Love and trust have dashed my heart to the pavement.
There will never be that childlike faith in a me again.
So where do I go from here?
Where is the end?
When will the madness end?