Now that the courtship had successfully ended
and the wedding suitably arranged
there remained a few things, said the fiancé
and what proceeded next was indeed strange!
She presented the groom with a menu of services
that as the future wife she would provide
He was to read it in all its entirety
and only then would he have to decide
Cooking was completely off the menu
and so was ever cleaning their house
Making love could never ever be demanded
with three months’ notice by either spouse!
There were a few weekly specials
but At the discretion of management could change
On some days she would avoid his company
on others could visits be arranged
This doesn't sound like marriage honey, he said
I wouldn't even classify this as a contract!
The terms seem unfair to the poor husband
therefore the offer of marriage, I must retract
Suit yourself dear, said the recalcitrant fiancé
With this marriage there comes a price
You either accept the services I'm offering
or remain a bachelor until your early demise
She left him in the company of the menu
and he ruminated on the items within
He surmised that it was a risky proposition
and the chances at happiness was surely slim
He immediately sent her a letter of intent
her offer of marriage he couldn't accept
He’d rather remain a unhappy bachelor
and live unencumbered with no regrets!