This Was Supposed to Be "Better"Mature

I seem to have this talent of fucking every good thing up. Ever heard anyone say that they just can’t seem to have anything nice? yea, I’m pretty sure that people started saying that shit because of me. I can’t seem to keep a normal relationship, I only like guys older than me and it seems that has lost me friends. I don’t know where I belong, so I say things that I guess I shouldn’t have. Everything I do seems to bring everyone else down and I don’t understand why or how or what I can do to fix the things that I have broken.

I like broken things, for they’re beautiful in their imperfections. But I broke this, and there is no way that I know of to fix it. I have pushed them all away, just like always. I think its time to just give up. Everyone is saying “it gets better, it gets better!” but this was supposed to be the “better” and quite frankly it sucks. I dont know who I am or where I belong and Im just so inexplicably sad even though Im so incomprehensibly happy at the same time.

I guess I’ll be fine, just not today, and probably not tomorrow, but sometime. I just hope that I dont do something I regret before I get there.

The End

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