Holiday's In My HomeMature

A couple years pass, the girl grows.
First Christmas without a part of her heart, first Christmas with him gone.
The house seems empty without him, even though her Mother is trying.
She is forced to visit him and he's damaged, he's not the same he once was.
Her beloved Daddy doesn't get her anything for Christmas.

"He hates me." She begins to repeatedly tell herself. 
The family is using her, using her as a tool to heal her Father.
She's trying to heal him, she's sacrificing herself for him but he won't try.
Faking a smile, thanking people for their present's. 
"I can't do this again." she murmurs to no one in particular.

Hold it together, bring it together.
Just for the holiday season.
The snow is softly falling, its deathly quiet outside.
I'll gather my thoughts for a second, tears filling my eyes.
I just want to let you know, I miss you.

She has cut herself off from him, but the pain just won't go away.
You shouldn't have left him alone, you worthless wretch you abandon him. 
Running outside, the things she's told herself are getting out of hand.
They won't go away, she has no peace.
The Holiday's are coming, she can't handle it

Raking her wrists against the brick, tears slide down her cheeks.
The angry red marks startle her, but she's remarkably at peace.
She's able to join in with her friends during their holiday cheering with this new sort of relieving.
Making it through the holiday season this way.
"Jesus......please don't hate me." she thinks, unable to speak from torment within her.

No one understands why she dislikes Christmas music.
No one understands why she won't get into the Christmas spirit.
No one understands why she doesn't get excited.
Happy families all around her, hurting her heart.
Its a knife in her heart, a reminder of all she doesn't have. 

Hold it together, bring it together.
Just for the holiday season.
The snow is softly falling, its deathly quiet outside.
I'll gather my thoughts for a second, tears filling my eyes.
I just want to let you know, I miss you.

A year has past, and its coming again.
Like a monster looming under the bed, the Holiday's are here again.
But the girl's not as a scared as she was a year ago.
In love with her Savior, the hole has been filled.
Could it be, she's actually truly joyful?

She still misses her Daddy, misses him so much.
But she's moving on, beginning to understand she can't help him anymore.
So much stronger than a year ago, so much happier.
Deciding to embrace the Holiday season.
"Happy Birthday Jesus, I love so dearly." 

The End

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