Something Lost

I have almost no thought process
The more the days go by
the harder it becomes to focus these ideas onto the page
I feel the words one slip of the tongue away
But every time it nears the edge
the thought jumbles
and the meaning is either lost
or distorted

It's frustrating
To have something one day
and then the next have it disappear from your hands
To suddenly have to struggle for what comes naturally
To have to reteach yourself your own environment
your own habits
your own thoughts
your own fears
to no longer feel what is you

It's a different kind of emptiness I feel
One where I can't even tell my own thought process
I can't tell if these words are flowing
or if they're forced
The only thing I can capture on these pages
is the jist of an idea

Even though it's fully developed in my head
The words refuse to translate to paper
I don't know if this is a rant
Or an attempt to regain something

Who knows what matters anymore

The End

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