I mend myself again.
I live in the eternal crevices of my mind, locked in a prison with only my thoughts as company. February is upon my heart, and in it I remain forever. The cold, the gray, the ice of my emotions is frozen over.
I am stuck in my healing. You touch is ever on my heart, your love is ever on my mind. No matter how many times I awaken without you near me, I can never fully let you go.
You are a part of me, and for that I bless and curse you. You, who wounded, tormented, and loved me wholeheartedly. It was you that broke and mended this fractured heart, it was you that tormented and satisfied my soul.
The obsession of my thoughts revolves around you, and I don't have the willpower nor strength to break your hold on me. You are gone, but you live forever in my memory. I am unhealthy with my longing for you the return to me, I don't begrudge that acknowledgement.
But all I want is to be free from your grip. I want to love and miss you, but continue on with my life. How do I let you go? How do I continue on without you? You were my life, and now that you have ceased to exist, I live in another time not so very long ago. A time where you held me, looked onto my innocent face, and whispered those words that both revived and killed me.
I want to be free, but I don't know how. I don't know how and I am trapped in the ever eternal struggle to attain my inescapable chains.
Someone teach me how to break the eternal bindings of yearning for lost love. Because I for one, do not know how. I am weary with the struggle.
Freedom is what I seek.