Scent of a man

Scent of a man

 

I opened up a stick of men’s deodorant

I don’t know if this matters but it was one of the bigger sticks sold at that location

It smelt vague, indistinct musk and cool air drifting through a French door

It wasn’t enough…

I smelt another one and another one…

Until it brought up the image of a man

Tall, barrel chested…

And other virile adjectives

Hairy

Solid

Thick horsemen’s thigh’s

And taunt runners legs

As I wavered, I craved a crash into his solid chest,

I toppled into the expansive air and almost becoming horizontal

It took all of that to realize that there was no one there

Physically, mentally

There was no man waiting for me too swoon

I brought a bottle of after shave to my nose

It smelt like icicles, frost and an exhaled mint

I felt all the more alone

But it didn’t stop me from unscrewing the cap and peering into the bottle of after shave

It was like peering into a dark blue cavern of man

I wanted to lounge on the pelts of the animals he had killed with his mighty spear…

In a fight of frustration and rationality ,I tossed the after shave onto the shelf and sent the cap bouncing shortly after it

I was quickly made aware of my blatant condition

How long had this being going on?

My lonliness crept up on me…

Maybe I should sneak into the magazine aisle and find myself a glossy archetype

Hopefully one who doesn’t look like he’s grunting or sneering

And then pair him up with the cover of recent dog fancy magazine

Awww…

Then take the dog fancy magazine away and just bask in the glory that is a spray tanned man

Yept it has come to that…

I need a man…

Dear god I need a man before I start mounting the manniquinns in the gap.

Or jerking off in a hunting supply store

I miss being touched by a man,held

Touching the silk of his hair and jealous of his dark wispy eyelashes

Being with someone who’s body and essence contradict mine

You can’t get that off of cragslist…

I struggle with filling that void and merely just covering it up

But I never thought I would fall so completely in it.

The End

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