psychotic hamster

they have said that i am classy,
that my presence brings them peace.
they have said that i love everyone
that my smile never fades into nothingness
that my generosity is endless.
they take my hands and tell me
i have made their day,
and they have held me so tightly
that a piece of my heart sticks to their coats
as they walk away.
they have told me they save the letters i write them
and i walk into their rooms and see those letters
resting on their beds.
they have witnessed my faithfulness
in responding to their texts
with all the enthusiasm of a psychotic hamster
running on a spinning wheel.
they have said that i have texted, or called,
or messaged or hugged or smiled or iloveyoued
at the exact moment they needed it the most.
i have heard them tell me
i have Jesus shining through my heart.
i have heard them say
that i saved their lives
and that they owe me forever.
yet i have carried on for Far, Far Too Long
without someone looking me in the eyes
and telling me
that i can be less than cheerful as a chickadee
for just one day of my life.

The End

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