Rodolfo Stiracci Coach is
Now sleeping with the roaches
Word is, he had quite a story for all
Truth or fiction, this man had a ball
They say he once shot a man down
Whilst wearing a wig, a bra and a gown.
They say he drank vodka by the bottle and case
That he then won the Indy 500 race.
Word is he played guard for the Heat,
Became an all-star with shoes on wrong feet
Some tell the story of his life as a climber
Though I’ve heard his Louvre paintings are much sublimer
After he won the World Series of poker
He cured the world of cancer and became a chain-smoker
And when the lottery paid him his fortune
He helped 6000 rich kids who’d been recently orphaned
He won three Nobel Prizes as humanity’s protector
Then faked his own death on a 3-D projector
It’s rumored he married thirty-one brides
Then wrote a book called “True Love:The Guide.”
Mr. Stiracci won three gold medals
Then had them bronzed and turned into a kettle
He bore three beautiful children and did work as a surgeon
Then transplanted his own….and died a virgin.
Now that he’s gone some say he’s still alive
That the legend of this man will forever survive
If it’s true there’s one thing we can surely tell
Rodolofo Stiracci Coach will be going to hell.