I'm a chocolate biscuit, I lie there on the desk,
Crumbling to pieces so much it's grotesque.
I'm waiting to be eaten but no one comes near,
I'm waiting for someone to take me from here.
I'm a chocolate biscuit I run round in the park,
Yelling to the people who haven't yet seen my spark.
They tell me that I'm crazy, tell me that I'm mad,
I tell them that their lives must be so, so, so sad.
Because I'm a chocolate biscuit and I do what I like
Poke me with your pencil, stab me with your spike -
I'll still be a biscuit, tasty and sweet
No matter what you do, and that's no mean feat.
I'm a crumbling old biscuit and I'm waiting for Spook,
She said she'd come and eat me, but hasn't taken a look.
I'm getting kinda lonely sitting here on the bench
And I bet her hungry stomach's really starting to clench.
'Cos I'm a chocolate biscuit and I'm not saying "no"
I don't follow rules and I guess it will show.
People tell me that I'm crazy, tell me that I'm mad,
But only 'coz they have to live a life that's so blooming sad!