This is a poem I wrote earlier this year, it was an attempt at suicide. It may seem I was saved from someone physically alive but really, I stopped myself. I am thinking if I'll be accepted into Heaven. Then reality hit me: I HAVE to stop or I'll lose everything!
I lay pouring out every bit of crimson betrayal
It numbs me to the grave
Descent too extreme for me to be saved
Will I again be denied?
Nothing can stop it, not even tourniquets
I die for deliverance
My soul seeks for six feet under
Pressure building up on my chest
Will I be accepted?
Whispers in the fading black
My shoulders are shaking
My vision blurry and unfocused
Morphed screams boom in my low hearing
Everything moving is slower
I’m being yanked from the warm liquids
I’m rested on the tile floors
My eyes heavy as lead
Neck sore from the full tub
Pressure on wrists and arms
Air comes through my throat and into lungs
I am reclined, broken and naked
Shouts ramming my drums
My throat and mouth intensely burns