seems like a ticking clock
imprinted on the backs of my eyelids
my eyes hurt from staring at the screen
as i pen out notes
with hands that refuse to release the pencil
i hate this.
and how does that bode well for university?
my mother says she'll pay for my first year,
but i don't know about after.
i feel like i'm still a little kid,
eight years old with the world in my hands,
wanting to squeeze just to see what'll happen.
it's 1 o'clock in the morning,
and i'm doing nothing with my life.
what courses do i even want to take?
i guess something to do with English,
and preferably something to do with herpetology.
but hell if i know.
i just want to hightail it out of here
and find a way to breathe without familiar city lights
and grimy streets paired with stale cigarette smoke
yet i know that i don't know what i'm doing
so i guess i better figure it out soon.