I chopped of my breasts
Tore out my hair
Did whatever I could to keep your hands of off me
But they always creep up my back, slide underneath my clothes
And then I wake up…
The weights still on my body
Still holding me down
So I kick of the blankets
And walk around
See! I’m free!
I walk to the window
See couples walking, staggering after one too many
Here I am longing for that drunkness
But I don’t want that envy
No… I want peace
I want it to fly out of our rib cages like freed doves
Take to the wind and soar to someone elses heart
With all the luck you’ve had why are you still so sad?
Why do you let the past chain you?
The keys dangling from your hand
And still you let it dangle
And lie in your bed stagnant
Stop talking to yourself people already think your messed up
I thought I told you to shut up!
I throw on jeans and a t-shirt
It’s an hour until last call
An hour of cat calls
I force myself to look around at the faces before me
I don’t want to take anyone home
I just want to find home