Oblivious

Sit still
So I can sulk in my despair
Full of energy
Yet void of emotion
Not a single passion ascending
from the depths of my conscious

Conscious
Conscious
The word rings in my vocabulary
I get sick of seeing it on the screen in front of me
Yet, the only thing I can do right now
Is to continue to let these thoughts flow
Let these tiles clank
Let this melody attempt to make sense
of the jumbled catastrophe floating around

Do or die
It's coming up tomorrow
But I won't pull an all-nighter
I can't even get myself up from this position
And even when I do,
my mind will fade into its fantasy land
It's funny
watching every decision you make
and knowing its the wrong one
Is it my angel speaking
or is she nowhere to be found?
I once asked for freedom
and now that I have it
I'm so bored I don't know what to do with it
Or perhaps I'm so afraid that I don't know how to deal with it

Either way
My sanity fades each passing day
and the choices are slowly backing me into a corner
Counting down the days
and no plan in tact
Yet as nonchalant as ever
Suppressing any feeling of sickness
any feeling of disgust
any feeling of remorse
any feeling of regret

It's like watching a game play out
With you being the player on both sides of the screen
Controlling
yet being controlled
Nonsense, yet it's a vicious cycle indeed.

The End

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