Mix of Emotions

Do you think you could handle
Everything I'm forced to handle?
Because I don't think you could
I think it would be too much

All the pain and guilt
Building up and being layered on
From so many places
It's suffocating

I don't have the option, blessing
To not talk to you for a day
To avoid all forms of contact with you
To be "alone" for a while

Maybe it's because I'm considerate?
Maybe it's because I have a concious?
Maybe it's because I care more for you than myself?
Maybe it's because I'm more giving?

I don't think you could handle
The pain of being alone by force
The guilt of not knowing the reasoning
The regret of what you possibly said or did wrong

But my reasons would be so very different
Not because of hatred, but of fear
Fear of the unknown, fear of the known
Fear of this thing we have between us -- love

Some days I wonder if it's right
Some days I wonder if it's true
Some days I wonder if it'll last
Some days I wonder if it's good

There are so many what ifs
bouncing around my head
There are so many things
we don't know for sure

Things are just so complicated
Life is moving so fast
I dream up pleasantries
But somehow they turn sour

I can't help but fear
These not-so-fairytale endings
That seem so much more likely
Than the things we dream together

I'm just asking, I'm just begging, I'm just pleading
Take away my fears, remind me why I love you
Banish all the hurtful, harmful alternatives
Instill the dreams we crave once more

The End

0 comments about this poem Feed