There were two people that affected her life. Only two, that made such a difference. She knew she had to make choices and decisions in life, but none that affected her like this. This decision had to be made. And she was the one that had to make it. Either way, someone would get hurt. But either way, her and someone else would hopefully be happy. Together. The other person would have to be forgotten. Added to the small box of all the memories she'd rather forget. And she'd have to carry on.
I was incredibly confused. Which one should I have chosen? I knew deep down what it was that I should choose, but there was still an element of guilt. I had already made up my mind; I had ‘unchosen’ two of the options, which left me with a last choice – One. I so badly wanted one, yet none may have been easier. Though after what I had discovered from my past experiences of this kind, I had an innate feeling that one would be good for me, better than none.
I tried to compare the three situations I had conceived in my mind. Pre-one, as I called it, had already come and gone. It was but a mere memory in a pool of so many going-ons. Some of it was good, and some of it was bad. All of it I had learnt from. And because of that, none of it would be truly forgotten. I did not have a single regret. Thinking about this left me with a feeling of content, making my decision I had made seem slightly easier.
The situation of none, looking at it properly, seemed negative compared with the other two. None seemed so... lonely. Lost. Missing a certain something that I craved. And that something I needed, otherwise I would feel unsatisfied, perhaps even disappointed. And after my previous experiences, that was something I definitely did not need. I’d had enough of disappointment. Enough of the little amount of satisfaction I was getting. I needed something different, something fresh. Which was why one was the option I wanted. One sounded so good right now. Yes, I would be stepping into the unknown, but I felt comfortable with it. I liked different. Different was better than the routine I had got myself into. And as I thought about it more, it started to seem even better. I was nearly convinced. Nearly convinced about something I had thought so much over.
And so I had made up my mind. I looked ahead and forgot about what had happened. My future was dotted with turnings and crossroads, yet I knew they would all link back to the main road I had chosen to follow. And as I followed it, I was finally true to myself, because I never wanted it to end.