lost paths in lose heads, i am losing any sense of direction

do you know where i've been lately

walking aimless circles inside the prison cell of my skull 
in my hands, a broken compass and weighted scale

and my body screams
give me pain give me pain give me pain 
you can't do anything right 

but i hold back 
break the bathroom razors with shaky hands 
am careful not to let a drop of blood go when the sharp edges fall into my palms 
trash them instead with skin that sings a song of violence against me

disposing of not-so-safe safety razors in a fit of pique
leaving scissors in messy drawers as though i could also lose my suicidal cravings 
all i want is a bit of peace

all i want is a bit of peace

a bit of peace 

is it really so much to ask

so do you, do you know where i've been lately 
a wanderer inside my own body 
did you know i am vulnerable and fragile 
porcelain figure painting pretty pictures with blood 

broken parasol and chipped glazing
i was not made to be a doll 

and all i want is a new path for a wanderer 
i don't want to be stuck here forever 
teetering on the line between sick and recovering 

so that's where i've been lately 
a spectre of myself and nothing more than a hollow outline. 

The End

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