I have a splitting headache.I should probably go outside and see the light of day, but its night and I'm not sure it'd do any good.
There is a heavy darkness that blankets the world,
I see these streets with filtered eyes
brilliance is a privilege that my soul no longer emanates,
Feeling is fleeting,
My heart is beating but i make no sound
My lungs are involuntarily breathing, if they didn't I'm not sure I would beg them to do their job.
My only purpose is to dispose my bones under blankets,
Seeking heat and tranquility but only finding a never-ending stock of headaches and tears-
This is the commemoration for all the years
Spent knowing what I wanted to be when I grew up, and everyone I ever met saying how the sky was the limit,
That my smile glittered bright like the stars I would rest among someday.
To you I owe an apology,
Because quite frankly I have fallen flat in a grave that I've dug myself.
I can fill graveyards with my motivations and dreams and goals,
You can fill libraries with all the ways I have surprised, disappointed, and left you unsatisfied.
This, like so much else lately, I have lost the energy to finish before the end could have been thought of, mapped out, loved,
So here I am, yet again, leaving you,
Littering the ground with the corpses of my attempts to greet tomorrow....