If I were a laptop all shiny and black
I'd take as much time as I could
To open the programs and refresh the page
And pretend that my innards were wood
I'd laugh at my owner as 'Enter' she'd press
Just over and over again.
She'd think that it makes such a difference you see.
I do enjoy being a pain.
The very best thing is when she's in a rush
And needs to get something done quick
I'd show my eggtimer as long as I could
and generally get on her wick.
She'd pound and she'd tap and she'd bash at the keys
And curse till the air it turns blue
And then, when she saw 'Not Responding' again
She'd start hitting me with her shoe.
I think in a while she would get her revenge -
Throw me down one of those rubbish chutes,
But up until then I would drive her quite mad
And count all the times she reboots.