Hard to be heard

This I say,
What must be said,
What you need to know,
What's in my head.

It's hard for me,
It always is,
With that I start,
And end with this.

It's not in words,
That I always hide,
What's not in my head,
But hidden inside.

It's happened once,
But it happened again,
This has scared me,
But it has to be said.

I don't want to say,
But it has to be heard,
What happened tonight,
With this i learned.

With me not saying,
With me still crying,
Left with nothing,
You keep guessing.

With you not knowing,
I'll always hide,
What's in my heart,
What's hidden inside.