If I stay, you'll be near.

If I stay, I will not fear

losing touch and losing mind

losing money and being unable to find


If I stay, I risk growing.

If I stay, I will be safe.

If I stay

my heart will break

into a million pieces.


But if I go, I leave you behind.

If I go, I'll never know

what we could have been,

all the beauty shared between love stained sheets

lost in the whirlwind of a washing machine

without these stains, I'll never be clean.

If I go, I'm on my own.

If I go, I am free.

If I go, I am somebody

no longer bound to your contradicting definitions

of who I ought to be.

If I go, I live a dream,

but without you,

my heart will break

into a million pieces.


The truth is,

you left me.


I remain in a vacant room,

lying in the bed you would rest,

touching the indent your head left

upon clouded pillows,

my ball and chain,

I am prisoned by the cowardly pain.

Though you are gone,

I linger on,

too terrified to leave,

coping with hoping for an impossible fantasy

that you'll come back to me.

If I stay, I'll decay in the ashes of a burnt out flame,

but if I go,

I'll be burned to wisps of smoke

by could-have-been words I never spoke.

The End

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