for once this is a (semi-)happy poem

wish we could turn back time
to the good old days
when our mama sang us to sleep
but now we're stressed out
- Twenty One Pilots,
Stressed Out

lying here in the sun
my head and shoulders
enshrouded by shadows
while my knees bathe in sunlight

i nap in the warmth
of another winter passed

my peers frolic
(if that is what it could be called)
acting out their memories
as little children

but to me it is a new bliss
not old memories
but a novelty -
i never got the childhood i wanted.

instead it was books
and cold weather
and sanctuary claimed in the library,
grammar became my best friend
and words were the only ones
who ever walked beside me.

but now
now i am required
by the rules of society
to interact with humanity,
fake smiles bestowed upon the undeserving

however, sometimes a 
simple pleasure like 
sleeping away the afternoon
in a comatose state of sunlight-enjoyment
while people shout and laugh
next to my ears (they make new memories)

and i find
that maybe there is happiness somewhere 
- for the first time, i begin
to believe myself when i tell myself
that everything will be alright

The End

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