As a writerMature

as a writer,
things are expected
you are intelligent
you are abled.
you have words
spilling from your veins
the thing is
we are not expected
to become attached
in different ways
as a writer
we are expected
to maintain
ourselves.
as a writer
i am none
of these things.
but isn't that
the biggest lie
i could ever spin?
oh darling.
as a writer
i believe
a muse
is as beautiful
as the writer
and my darling
i disagree with that now.
you are a muse
that reigns
a muse
that leaves all
in stuttering
disbelief.
as a writer
i believed
i was capable of little
these words
so complicated
i could barely
form anything
resembling
a constellation.
as a writer
i did not think
i would have a muse
as intricate as you.
as a writer
we are expected
to think every muse is easy.
simple.
you are delicate
and difficult
you are
more than i thought,
more than i expected
as a writer
i believed
love was easy
for words
that it was much harder
for any blood
tainted or virgin.
Rather,
as a writer
i believed
music
was good enough
to win over
a love,
but then
it wasn't your love.
as a writer
i felt
a muse deserved more
as a writer
i got attached
to every inch of mine
that i could even touch.
as a writer
i spun tales
and worlds
anything
for you
that you asked for
was yours.
as a writer
i leapt
for something
i never knew
could exist.
as a writer
i wrote
for a muse
whose love
i knew
was mine.

The End

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