I see proud human beings reduced to crying shadows 

I watch age creep onto the faces of the people I love

And into the faces of strangers, as they crumble and dissipate

Until they're lives are nothing but memory and dust. 

I watch the world pass me by as I go through the motions

Fulfilling meaningless orders and requests with frantic hands

I see how each morning rises with the sun, and how quickly it is dark. 

***

I see young children clutching the hands of people they must say goodbye to  

Waving to people they can't, shouldn't live without 

tears that roll and stretch into an empty white clinical silence

I watch them wither in hospital beds, they're faces

Collapsing into a pain, that pierces their families hearts

The mothers that can stay... watch... 

Until they're child's minds are still and they have drifted into nothing. 

***

I see a girl losing her hold, on everything and anything she has 

as she remembers how they taunted and laughed

as she remembers that cutting hurt.

I see a boy who never had a chance at happiness 

After he lowered his father into the ground

After he lowered his high hopes into the ground with him. 

I see a woman hiding from the shadows inside her head

Through emptying a small pill jar and giving up. 

Through refusing to breathe the air in this place. 

***

I watch as human beings become living and dead

Waiting, Crying, Hurting, Losing, failing, Just breathing, Dying...

And as I fall back into that place I thought I'd risen from

As I fall back to that place where nothing is worth anything

As I fall back into that gap between everything I can't be

I lose grip on any faith I possessed. 

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