This is three months in my life that I just kept adding too as it happened, and it kinda shocked me looking back on it now that all this happened in just three months.
I have lost weight
And I am in pain
But do not start me off again.
As to what is wrong
in my life. It would take forever
To tell of whenever
I could go on no longer.
People are alive because of me
And that is how I want them to be.
I have never told anyone
It is on my chest
And do not get me started on the rest.
I hate my mother
But I cannot tell
It's like she holds me under a spell.
I am an embarrasment to them
But they did not have to say
Now I hurt each and every day.
The one I love told me
His sister could die
Each night since then I only cry.
I am all alone
I have to fight myself to stay alive
For my friends I must survive.
Now my aunty is in hospital
They do not know what is wrong.
What if she shall be forever gone?
My mother has been sacked
Now we have no money
Will life ever again be funny?
I face each day
With a dragging heart
It doesn't help that I am smart.
I am almost not allowed
To follow the religion I choose
But in that I will not loose.
My best is not enough
But I did alright
There is no grounds for a fight.
They are not happy with me, the way I
Am not into fashion or boys
But I have other joys.
I need a doctor
But what if he tells me I am to die
I refuse to watch my friends cry.
Now our car is broken, it needs to be repaired
But we have no money to spend
It's not just the car that needs to mend.
Valentines Day is near
I have no one to kiss
But that luxury I shall have to miss.
All my friends are in depression
I fear them committing suicide
But I cannot put it all behind.
Slowly I am failing
In my subjects at school
It feels like I am drowning in a deep dark pool.
I just found out
That another of my friends takes drugs
Why did she get involved with those thugs?
I want to protect them
I cannot work out why
I cannot seem to save them, no matter how hard I try.
My brother nearly got concussion again
Our mother does not care about him
But to disobey her is a sin.
All my treasured memories
Are being lost as time goes by
Am I too young to really die?
Every time I stand
My head spins round and round
I cannot see or hear a sound.
I am beginning to care
More about the boys in the park
I do not want them to be alone after dark.
My life is repeating
Over and over
I want everyone else to find the four leaf clover.
My mother is in hospital
I don't care one bit
Maybe I should be bothered about it.
But does that make me just like her
Could I never care about anyone else
And only myself?
My ex-best friend claimed I never helped her
That I didn't really care
But I know I was always there.
I do not want to feel
Like I let someone down
Like I was the one who made them frown.
I cannot get it across
That is not me
The real me no one can see.