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Character emotion and body language (1st chapter review)
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Protagonize is a creative writing community dedicated to writing various forms of collaborative, interactive fiction.
One author writes a story, poem, or other work, and others post branches or chapters to it in different directions. The result is an organic, evolving tale where everyone can participate.
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I've found this a huge roadblock while pursuing my dream of writing. Character motivations and backstories are something I'm good at, but when it comes to enacting those things with active body language... nah. No good.
I don't quite have a lot on Protagonize yet, but I'd love it if you could take a look at the first chapter of Leech Child and give me the truth. Maybe with a little drizzle of chocolate on top. I want to hear what's wrong with it, but I'd also like to know what I should keep doing.
Anyways. Here's the link: http://www.protagonize.com/story/leech-child
I'll go and take a look at other member's stories when it isn't 5 in the morning!