Name: Ethel Rogers
Date of Birth: Who cares? I'm still pretty:)
Appearance: I've got long locks of auburn hair that bring out the peircing green that my eyes so proudly claim. I'm very short, but pretty. Also, I am very pale. Almost like a vampire. I sparkle and everything. Daddy says that my pale-ness just makes me more beautiful and that I'm like a beautiful wild-flower on a breezey summer day. I've got Irrital Bowel Syndrome (IBS). People? They DIE to be me. No joke. Someone had a stroke because they wanted to be me sooo badly. It was funny, but only because I'm pretty and I look cute when I laugh.
About me: My dad is an owner of a farm out in North Carolina. He's very rich, which grants me access to any and everything my beautiful heart desires. I've got 3 cats, 2 dogs, 8 fish (the pretty kind, of course), 2 parrots, 4 baby ducklings (they live in the small pond inside my room), 3 rabbits, and 1 minature monkey that once belonged to a man named Eugene, a quite striking man who works for my father. Eugene also has a pet monkey, named Phil, although Phil is a girl. She had babies, and I thought one of the miny monkeys would just look fabulous with my striking green eyes. So I got one. I think I'm in love with Eugene, but I can't be sure. He's very handsome. Yet, I feel as though he would try to buy my love. I also yearn for his brother, Mark (they call him Jack, for short). Mark/Jack dips and sells used cars, which I find highly attractive. I also feel as though he would never even attempt to buy my love and approval. Daddy says that it's because he wouldnt be able to afford it. But I just find him so endearing.
**6 months later**
Important changes and things in my life: Let's see. I eloped with Mark/Jack. Eugene won $200,000,000 in a lottery and I guess he loved me so much (who doesn't?) and he donated it all to the IBS fund to find a cure for my diese. It worked and I got cured. I had a feeling that he would try to buy my love! HAHA! I was right!!
One month later, after I didn't respond to his numerous letters, Eugene died in a tragic accident trying to say Phil, his monkey. It's a sad story, really. Phil got traped inside a Junior Food Mart Restroom stall, and Eugene was just trying to rescue him! After I heard the news, I felt a great emptiness inside of me. I started looking at Mark/Jack for the man who he really was. I decided that Eugene was the only man for me, so I left Mark/Jack and retreated into the Amazon Rainforrest. I thought for weeks about what I wanted to do with my life and concluded that I, Ethel Rogers, wanted nothing more than to make prom dresses for people with the same IBS that I had. They were a great success, made possible by the built-in-diapers that I so cleverly thought of including. Now I'm a millionaire. A very pretty millionaire!
*******COMPLETELY MADE UP**********