Apples: the seemingly healthy alternative to visiting a doctor. The plain green, smooth skin that looks seemingly harmless constantly watches you, begging to be eaten.

The sharp stalk fights every step of the way as you try to twist and pull it off. Once finally pulled off, which may result in the apple or the stalk being sent to the other side of the room, the cold hard skin allows it to turn effortlessly in your hand.

As you bite down the skin splinters and breaks, cutting into your gums and more often than not causing you to bleed onto it. As well as the pain, your mouth is drowned in the juices - often sharp not sweet. The sudden burst of liquid causes you to choke.

It oxidises after a few seconds of being out, even when you turn your back to get a drink that you had prepared earlier, which ruins your chosen midday snack of Apple and Cheese.

Apples: Harmful and teasing. I would rather visit the doctor than eat one of these supposedly harmless weapons of torture.

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