When I learned that Jade had died all of my thoughts towards her just fell away from me. A jumbled mess of words that wouldn't budge. A blur of words that refused to be spoken as the silver charms that used to belong to her, were fastened securley around my wrist.
"Jade's favourite charm bracelet..." It was all I could manage.
But as though fate wasn't quite done breaking hearts...the second blow came.
Ally's death hit all of us like a freak storm; no-one saw it coming; no-one wanted to accept that it was possible.
But it was...and she was gone.
The days that passed after their deaths were just a blur of abstract shapes and muffled sound: the tears I fought against refused to let me see the world as anything but grey and even now I don't want to contemplate just how much worse it must have been for Jerry. When I felt strong enough to once again face the outside world I found myself walking through unfamiliar territory.
Loss does that to you. Death of the one's you hold close will change your entire perception of the world. Of life.
I went for a walk one day afterwards, I couldn't tell you how soon it was after her death, time was far too blurry. But what I can tell is that when I walked I let my feet carry me and my mind wander in a different direction to anything solid or real. When I eventually opened my eyes to reality I found myself outside a house that used to home a good friend.
But it wasn't Ally's doorbell I was ringing.
"Jules?" ignoring my better instincts, and the pained expression on his face, I finally gave in to the aching desire to be held...
...And collapsed into Nick's open arms.