Written December 6, 2012
From the moment I first realized I was in love with you, I knew it was a mistake,
One that despite the strength I thought I had, was not enough to make me leave.
I fear my foolishness will result in the untimely demise of yet another fragment of my heart.
A fragment I'm sure to never get back and will make me even more bitter than the last I gave willingly.
Still, each day I await your text or to see your face like it is the last time I will ever see it.
There is no doubt in my mind that I am in love with you.
You are the reason I wake with a smile, the reason for my laughter and positive outlook on even the most depressing of situations.
I try and hold onto the strength I do have so that I'm not such a downer all the time in your eyes.
So hard it is sometimes though to put on a smile so that you don't see just how much I hurt.
I want to be with you all the time and yet I cannot.
Factors we were both well aware of before hand play the major role in why we cannot be together.
This pains me beyond belief and yet I still cannot walk away.