First off, I've had this question in my mind for quite some time: where exactly is this...United States...place that you speak of? Sounds fascinating. I might enjoy a visit there some day.
Second, your problem could be much worse. Imagine the pain of having every single last tiny little bone excruciatingly shattered, your skin flexing itself into positions it was never meant to take, hair sprouting all over your body simultaneously (much more painful than one might think), and then your bones shifting, repairing themselves in a split second, and ending up in rather crooked positions that make certain parts of your body extremely uncomfortable. Then, the next day, you wake up to find that the whole thing has happened again in reverse, your entire body feels as though you've lost an argument with a cave bear, you've got a screaming headache, and of course, you're lying in the middle of a cornfield. Five miles from the nearest town.
Now, picture that happening to you once a month, whenever nature chooses to take its course.
Sorry to butt in, and yes, I do realize there's probably a run-on sentence somewhere in there, but really, come on... a ghost? If you want him dealt with, I happen to know someone who could probably work wonders for you. Please, bring him over, and I'll have my friend come down to help you out. While you're here, perhaps we could share some steak. Or chicken. I happen to have an overabundance of fresh chicken lately.