For Yann's Eyes Only

Dearest Yann--

I will never forgive myself for the way I treated you. I was wrong-- I know that now. I should have realized what you meant to me, but instead I played you for a fool. But we were so young... and the world was our oyster, and it only made sense to slap some cocktail sauce on it and suck it out of the shell. You always loved oysters.

But look at me, talking about delicious food when I haven't spoken to you in so many years. I do have important things to say.

I've missed you, Yann. Every time I see a yellow blimp advertising a furniture store blowout sale, I think of you. And I wonder if you can see it too, from wherever you are. Probably not, I guess those things don't fly very high. 

The point is, I've made mistakes in the past and I've suffered for them. I've lived a long and loveless life ever since you left me. It hasn't been easy, but I've managed thus far. I hear you're doing well, though, and I'm very happy for you. My only regret is that I am not doing well too.

I know this may be difficult for you to hear... as I'm sure you've thought all this time that I was a flighty, promiscuous babe that would have surely found herself another man soon after you left... but the truth is, I didn't. I'm just as alone now as I was on that fateful day at the rodeo. But I forgive you for that. I understand now. I deserved it.

And now I must say what I came here to say, although it pains me to think what your response may be. Please take me seriously. 

I still love you, Yann Martel. I don't think I will ever be happy again unless I am with you. From the bottom of my heart, I beg you...

Take me back.

I will always love you. And if you read this entire letter, I promise to read Life of Pi.

- Rachel

The End

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