"Well, Sir... Trooper 1 is my sister, older than me by six millenia. She rebelled against the rule of the Anchient Ones, and, with the help of a budding race called the Humans, banished them to the far corners of existence using trickery and dark magic. Having such an evil sibling is hard on me, which is why I wanted you to come here. If I may, I'd like to express my concern over these recent events. First, I told you that 26 batches of my kind would reach you, yes? Where are they? it is not in our nature to be so late for such an important thing as protecting the chosen one... I mean, you, Sir. I think they were ambushed en route by my sister's forces, which means that she is stronger. Also, your "Green Arrow Man"... well, it could be that he is no man, but an Anchient One enslaved by dark magic- specifically, I think he may be Thorson, who once had dominion over markmanship. Enslaving an Anchient One requires vast amounts of life energy, which means that Trooper 1 has enough of it to summon minions. Also, consider the pit that you found Trooper 2 in. I had runes woven into the fabric of the sling I lowered you down with which protected you, but anyone in there unprotected would at the very least get jolted into another dimension. Hordes of deamons live in there if I am correct as to what it is: The Pit of Tartus. Trooper 2's weakness always was money, and my sister exploited that by putting him in the Cavern of Riches, effectively neutralising him."
"Waitasecond... you telling Me that Me the Chosen One? Thats a lod of BTS (Big Troll Sh*t). Me just a Orc, and didnt do anything special. Yous a big lire: you said that you need majik two get out of the pit , but I falled of and Me did fine! You crazy just like Trooper 2! You lying all the time me bets! 'Can't trust anything you say, you stinky-"
-CRASH!! GRRROAR!BOOM! AHHH! SMASH! THUD!! UFF! Uhhh..-
Trooper 3 did Not look nice happy... he locked kind of skard, actuly. What ever. Hes a lyer so I don't no, but Me runned in too the other rrom wher the sounds hapend and there was Celttam on the floorand he was flickering like between wolfy and peepole and ther waz blod evrywere and there was firey boys with big fat spears and theys laphing and then dumb old Trooper 3 shouts-
"Qurevok! Don't think about the deamons being destroyed!"
" Whatdya meenMe kant think about it?-"
And just like that snap crackle pop the deamons dide. In the air were they were yu could cind of see there faces, very suprised. Weird. Also, the hole house was quite know. Me looked back at Trooper 3, and he winked at me with fake brovado.
"That is why you are the Chosen One. I wasn't supposed to tell you unless things became to risky- I think our current situation qualifies. You just killed every deamon in the sanctuary, and sealed off all entrances to Limbo for three or four hours: you aren't even phased."
Me didn't kare, just rushing over two Celttam. Me seed hes ded.