Chips or fries?

As Gabby's stomach grumbles, I chuckle quietly. This ‘adventure' is at least entertaining, if boilingly hot from wearing a hoodie in the sun while I'm running with a half vampire on my back.

‘We're going on an adventure' is what my dad always used to say when we got lost on holiday, but I'm not about to tell Gabby that. I don't need to ask to know she isn't keen on getting lost.

It is at this point that super ultra mega sensitive hearing comes in handy. Okay, I'm exaggerating; it's only super hearing, but y'know. I can still hear a bus engine at five miles. Especially one I've been listening to for the past god knows how long. So I guess as long as I'm going vaguely in the right direction, I'll hear it eventually.

Finally, we find a little cafe restaurant thing and I realise just how hungry I am, too. Right now, it's for human food, but I'm thinking sitting in a small room full of people is going to shift my appetite slightly. I try not to think about that as I hold the door open for Gabby.

"Thank you, kind sir," she says in this posh voice, giving an over dramatic curtsy before going inside. I try to smother my laughter, but people are already staring anyways. She's curtsying in ripped jeans, for god's sake. No wonder people are looking at us like we're nuts. Still trying to hold back my laughter, I pull out a chair for her at a table in the corner away from the windows.

"Ah, such a gentleman," she smiles and tries to sit down elegantly. But then she stumbles and curses, "crap. Well, we all knew I was gunna fail." I sit down opposite her, not bothering to hold back on my laughter anymore.

When I've calmed down, I have a quick glance at the laminate menu and push it towards Gabby. I don't need to look at it to know that this place will do steak and chips.

"Mmm... Food. I want a jacket potato with baked beans, please." Gabby mumbles into the menu. I think she's talking to me. I hope so, otherwise she's gone crazy and thinks the menu is listening to her.

"Don't ask me, ask the waitress," I say, indicating to the sullen looking waitress walking over.

"She looks happy..." She mutters under her breath sarcastically before looking up at the waitress. "Do you have jacket potato and baked beans?"


"Awesome. I'll have that," she says, grinning at me. The waitress then looks to me for an order.

"Steak and chips. Rare steak," I say, flashing her a smile. She doesn't smile back. "What a charmer," I chuckle when she's gone. "D'ya think I should have said fries? They don't understand that chips are chips over here, do they? They think that chips means crisps." Stupid Americans.

"Chips mean crisps and fries mean chips and crisps don't mean nothing..." she mumbles to herself thoughtfully. She looks back up at me and then says; "yeah, probably." I'm beginning to worry about her mental health.

"Ah well. They can shove their Americanisms where the sun shines so I don't have to see it." I grumble quietly, so I don't offend the Americans sitting nearby. I don't fancy pissing off a native with a gun. I mean, I doubt that it'd kill me, but it'd still hurt like a b*tch for a few hours.

"Funny," Gabby giggles and I smile, enjoying the cool of the shade and her company as we wait for our food. I unzip my hoodie and take it off, glad to be able to take it off for the first time in ages.

Finally, moody waitress girl brings out our food and I smile as I see she figured out what I meant by ‘chips'. She dumps Gabby's jacket spud in front of her with all the grace of a... well something ungraceful. My steak and chips is put in front of me in the same way and I take one look at it and I don't need to cut it to tell it's been cooked til it's leather. I roll my eyes, but I'm not in the mood to argue, so I just eat the chips and poke the steak a bit.

At least Gabby looks like she's enjoying hers...

Man, that girl's messy.

The End

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