Jeana - Wanderings


     About half an hour later I was on my way home, after I was sure they had given up and I was alone in the school.  I was no closer to figuring out what had happened than before, so I decided to take a roundabout route on the off chance something else strange happened before I was home.  I was still invisible, as far as I could tell, so I certainly didn't want someone to suddenly see me appear from nowhere if the invisibility ever wore off…or turned off…or stopped working…or whatever it was supposed to do.  Part of me was beginning to worry that I might be invisible for a very long time.  What would I do if that happened?  I couldn't think about that though.  I was hoping the problem was simply  that I was panicky.  Maybe - if this was a new ability of mine and not some singular freak event - it was almost a reflex or instinct for self preservation, and since I was still basically freaking out I couldn't make it stop.  Assuming that was the case, than I HAD to find a way to calm down.  The very fact that I was invisible for some reason wasn't helping, which just made me frustrated.  Maybe eventually I could learn to control it.  I BETTER learn to control it, or my life would be a total mess considering how often things unnerve me.

     I was lucky that there were not more people out, the streets I took were practically deserted.  Despite the fact that I was invisible, I was still making noise and that would not go unnoticed if there were people around. I knew there was a small forest nearby; nature always calmed me, so I decided to head in that direction.  Once I was well into the trees, I found a pleasant place to settle down and ended up doing homework, of all things, just to get my mind off of what was going on.  I felt that that would be the key.  Time passed quickly, and eventually I realized that I could see my hands again!  Strange, I hadn't felt a thing.  I hadn't even noticed when it happened, so I didn't even know exactly how it worked yet.  Even so, I couldn't be happier.  Now I could try to forget about the whole thing and just try not to get into another uncomfortable situation.  Besides, it was getting late and my mom would wonder where I was.  I gathered up my things and hurried toward home.

     As I opened that back door of our house, I called loudly, "Mom, I'm home!"  I normally didn't do anything like that, but I knew my mom would be worrying.  Sure enough, after dumping my stuff on the floor just inside the door, she came from the direction of my room with a relieved look on her face.

     "Jeana, where have you been?  You said you'd spend a little extra time in the library after school today, but surely you weren't there for that long!"

     I sighed.  "Chelsea and her gang were after me again today, Mom.  I'm sorry, it just delayed me a bit.  I took my time on the way home to calm down."  At least none of that was a lie, I thought to myself.  I hated lying, especially to my mom - which was good, because I'm a terrible liar.  I was glad I could say that much honestly, even if it wasn't quite the whole truth.

     She was obviously still concerned, but what kind of mother wouldn't be?  "Are you okay, honey?  They didn't…is there anything I can do?"

     I forced a smile.  "No, Mom, I'm fine.  Or, I will be in the morning after a good nights sleep.  I'm pretty tired, so I'll just go up to my room and crash if that's all right with you."  She nodded and gave me a quick hug before I headed up the stairs. 

     Saying that I was pretty tired was true, but it was still really early.  I didn't intend to "crash" right away - I needed to think.  Retreating to my room for the evening meant not having a normal meal, but I always had a stash of snacks in my room. 

     Half an hour later, try as I might, I could find no explanation for what had happened.  It was scary.  Very scary.  I had realized that this was something I couldn't ignore, despite the fact that I wanted to deny it completely.  I was starting to get all worked up and anxious again, so I decided to just go for a walk.  After slipping downstairs and out the door very quietly - I wasn't sure why, but it seemed like it would be easier if my mom didn't know I was gone - I simply started walking.  I wasn't going anywhere in particular.  I just walked, and wondered, and wished there was someone who could explain this to me.

The End

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