it was dark out now. A dense fog had rolled in as the sun sank into the horizon. Even the street lights struggled to illuminate the streets. An eerie feeling filled the abandoned apartment. Raine was still out cold. Emma had been gone since I had gotten back. She was probably working. I couldn't shake the feeling that I should be out there looking for Jade but I had nowhere to start; maybe Raine would know where to look? It was no use to fret over so I distracted myself with food; not that it would help Mr noodles was hardly a hard thing to make unless you had the unusual ability to burn water. When it was all done that was when Emma busted through the tired front that was only hanging on by defying logic and a few miracles.
"Oh thanks! I'm starving!" She said grabbing the bowl of noodles," work was terrifying today. People were coming in with all sorts of strange wounds. I couldn't stop thinking about what you told me. Especially when I saw a few bites on some necks. Something is happening Mike and I'm scared but I don't want to sit by and pretend that it's going to fix itself. I have left work." She said between mouthfuls.
"I'm not going to say anything against it. Who am I to say to keep a normal life." I said already starting a new batch.
"Thanks." she said piping down finishing the bowl and and checking on Raine," Still out. poor guy."
"Yeah. I don't blame him."
" Did you find, talk to that Ash fellow you were talking about today?" She asked walking into the kitchen leaning on the counter.
"Yeah sort of. Things turned out badly. They got Jade and did something to him, I couldn't stay though. These werewolves that were guarding him attacked me.
"By they you mean vampires?"
"Yeah." I said not paying attention to the stove any more just staring into Emma's eyes sullenly feeling the full weight of failure in my chest. Maybe a few seconds went by maybe it was a minute but suddenly she was smoking, and the water was boiling off to the point that I would have to refill the pot.
" want one?" She said wagging the cigarette around indicatively. I nodded giving up on the noodles; wasn't that hungry anyways. She reached into her pocket taking out a metal box filled with cigarettes quickly handing me one and lighting it in my fingers.
"I remember when you quit smoking. You were so damn full of yourself. Telling us all to quit. " she said breaking out a small smile. I didn't bother saying I didn't remember and returned the smile.
"Was I like that before all of this?" I said before before taking a large well deserved drag from the cigarette.
"Sometimes," She teased," You were funny, easy to annoy though, but you always really cared more than you ought to. yeah sometimes you pissed us all off but we all have our moments,but you always made it up with a smile a laugh and humor. It's heartbreaking to see you this way all serious. Hardly ever smiling. It makes me think of what you've seen, and what I'll see."
"Who knows? Hopefully by the end of it though we won't have to see any more of it." I take another drag heading to the front door," I want to take a walk."
"I'll come. He'll be okay?"
"Yeah. I'm not going to far."
We left the apartment in silence. I could feel that she had something to say but was holding it all in. I find my hand wavering between pulling her aside to ask or to just comfort her. The fog still lingered densely over the street making it hard to see far past five feet. A few more minutes of silence and my hand had decided to just stay by my side.
" I don't know how I keep going Mike. After when they told me they found his and Carl's body. I cried but the next day I woke up feeling nothing. I just got up and went to work the day seeming just be black and white. Then I see you yesterday out of the blue and you start talking this batshit crazy story that some how fits in this shitty walk of life. I can feel the full weight of losing Jack. Yet I don't want to buckle. I want to fight. I miss him so much though but he already feels years behind me. It makes me feel like I just want to forget him. Is that what I'm trying to do?" She starts a few tears already running down her face but her voice still calm and collected.
" I.........," I pause stopping in, " I don't know. But feeling just grief, and pain is part of it but moving forwards is the only thing I know and is the only thing I can tell you. That's all I can really say. I'm sorry."
She grabbed my arm her face holding back tears. I bring her closer holding her head against my chest. There was nothing else that could be said that could make it better nothing about losing someone could be fixed with a few words. We stood still for a while her face buried in my jacket and my arms wrapped around her comfortingly. I wondered how many else were feeling the same tonight as the sounds of sirens continuously sounded throughout the fog.
"We should get back." I said.
she stepped back quickly wiping her face before grabbing that same metal container. Pulling out two cigarettes handing me one without question. I started walking back but found her hand stopping me as I did.
"It's okay." She pulled back a little forcing me to look into her eyes. The glow of our cigarettes producing just enough light to define our faces.
"You don't have to mention it." I said starting turn around to find her hand grabbing mine again.
"Yes?" I said her lips had started to move but were frozen in place, " Em?"
" I. Um.... ah... forge.... don't die okay. I don't want to be left alone here."
" You won't." I said this time letting her hand to let go. She stared into my eyes for a few seconds longer before letting go.
"Let's go back." She said putting that last moment past her.
The walk finished the same as it started silently and with lit cigarettes. The apartment and Raine had remained the same as they had left it and I find myself on the couch with my own thoughts again with Emma beside me. I started thinking of Billie guilt filled me. Why? I looked at Emma briefly the guilt increased. No this can't be happening I thought. I shook my head pushing both Emma and Billie away. We needed to find Jade and to do that I needed Raine to be conscious. The only thing I thought of was getting the tired vampire some blood, maybe that would get him to come around.
"We need to get him blood." I said outloud.
"He's been out for almost two days straight now. Vampires live off the stuff it must also restore them in a ways."
"Fair but we are not getting it from the hospital even with me working there its not going be easy with all that's going on. " alright what about the equipment to donate the? it will be fresh to."
"Yeah but that's going to make one of us vulnerable if he turns out to not be an ally."
"Let me do it. I'm sure that he knows we're not friends with the vampires that tortured him, and you know what they say right about the enemy of your enemy?"
" I don't like this."
" It's all we got right now. If you're afraid of getting attacked at the hospital I'll be right there with you."
"Alright, but I'm letting you know this doesn't make me feel any better about it." She said.
"We should start first thing tomorrow morning." I say getting up moving towards my bedroom.
"alright.. I'll start going to bed to then. Is it okay if I.. we share a room tonight? I can sleep on the floor!" She finished quickly. Taken back and somewhat flustered and feeling my face go all hot it took me a moment to collect myself. I thought about Billy guilt started to fill me again, but another part of me pushed that aside.
"Err.. yeah.. you can sleep on the bed I'll move the couch." I said.
"Alright." She said her composure coming back offering to help lift the couch into the room. I grabbed blanket and pillow quickly. She brought hers in from the room she had claimed.
"No funny business." She stated almost accusingly.
"You the one that wanted to be here." I retorted starting to lay down on the couch.
"Don't look." She said. I was about to protest about how she could have changed elsewhere but instead kept thinking don't look, don't look over and over.
"It's alright now." She said wearing a big dumpy t shirt that was too big and went most of the way down her legs that were bare from what I could see. She laughed, " I bet you really wanted to you pervert."
" I bet you did to." I said under my breath.
"What was that?"
"Goodnight." I said turning the light off.
"Thanks Mike and goodnight." She said laying down.