My imaginings of this moment could not compare. I was free as a bird. The heat between us was so passionate I was worried the sheets would catch alight and the whole building would burn in flames. And even then we would not notice. I didn't care, didn't care that this was not the day we had wanted to wait for. It was the right time.
I lay looking up at the ceiling, out of breath and covered in glistening sweat and the smell of him. The smell of Evan. Oh how I breathed it in like it was my life's breath. When my breathing had settled I rolled over and smiled at him, lying in his arms.
"That was incredible." I whispered, running my hands over the muscles of his chest.It rose and fell softly. He was asleep. My smile widened, looking at his soft eyes. He was mine.
I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I knew, the comfort beneath me fell away and I awoke sprawling, in shock, on my bed.
"What the...?" I cried, looking round. Evan was standing at the side of the bed, gazing at me in horror. I looked down at myself, twisting and turning to see what was wrong. My stars were brighter today, and they were itching like crazy now that I was fully aware of them, but nothing seemed odd.I looked back up at him. "Evan? What's wrong?"
"What.... what happened?" His voice was strangled, like he was mortified and aware of some great tragedy.
"What do you mean?"
"What happened? Why are we...?" He seemed to lose the ability to speak, instead gesturing wildly at our naked bodies.
"What are you talking about? I thought you enjoyed last night? I thought... don't you remember?" I asked, feeling a lump growing in y throat and water springing to my eyes. He seemed to have no recollection of the most amazing night of my life. And what I hoped had been the most amazing night of his as well.
"Remember...?" His brow furrowed and he stood, thinking. "I remember Alex...."
"Alex? What happened with Alex? Why can't you remember?" I felt a tear slide down my cheek.