How To Over-Analyze

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How to Over-Analyze.

Step 1: Find a problem / situation.
You need to find something which you can observe, and later, over-analyze. You can choose something simple, like a paradox, or something harder, like a smile that a strange person flashes at you.

Step 2: Observe.
Observe whatever subject or scene you have chosen. Let's use the aforementioned smile-that-a-strange-person-flashes-at-you. 

All right; observing time. It is a wide, toothy smile. The person who is showing you this smile is a member of the opposite sex, of compatible age to yours. It is a random person about ten meters away from the grocery store you always visit, and you are about three meters from the store, anyway. The person is dressed dirtily, he appears homeless.

Step 3: Analyze the reasons.
Analyzing is fairly easy. Think of a few possibilities why the person could be smiling at you. Why do people smile at others, generally? Sometimes it's just out of mere politeness. Sometimes they smile out of spite, the typical Mean Girls smile. Sometimes they think you're someone else, and they smile accidentally. Perhaps that's why the person smiled at you.

Step 4: Analyze the reasons with more depth.
Now that you have some basic possibilities, think about a more serious reason, such as, he/she knows something dangerous which you don't. What could he/she know that you don't? 

Step 5: No reason is ever irrational.
The title states it all; no possibility is ever irrational. Every reason you can think of is completely possible and likely to happen, whether it includes aliens or strange people who nurse affections for red pepper - it could actually happen. Perhaps the Something which the person knows is that a bomb is planted in the shop, and - here, we shall go a little more deep - the next person who checks in their groceries will cause it to explode. Perhaps you are the next person.

Step 6: Analyze the possible outcomes.
Here comes the part where you have to think about YOU must do. If you are the next person who will trigger the bomb to exploding, then you musn't go inside. If you don't go inside, you should call the police, or the bomb-safety department.

However, what if you aren't the next person? What if another person inside is about to get their groceries checked? In that case, you should probably run away from the store to avoid injury. But maybe you should be heroic and go inside and stop the cashier from checking any more groceries.

But what if the Next Person is suicidal, and wants to die? Then you should let them, shouldn't you? Or maybe the Next Person is a cruel human being who once kicked a puppy by accident, so he/she deserves to die. But if it was an accident, does that mean death is what the person deserves?

Maybe if you run in right now, you can stop everything. But then you might get affected! What if the bomb explodes, and you lose a limb? Your life will change drastically. Is it worth that risk? Is it not?

Step 7: Practice your analyzing skills.
Obviously, you cannot perfect this in one day. You need to practice this whenever possible, whether it be on suspicious smiles or on a failing grade with a teacher you dislike, or on world hunger. The more you practice, the more naturally it will come to you. Soon, you will be able to do it without trying!

So there you have it; the seven steps to becoming an over-analyzer. Good luck with your attempts!

NOTE; This may lead to extra stress, worry, anxiety attacks, which may lead to... well, analyze it and find out.

The End

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