Amazed by the plethora of relationships and its effects one's life and how humans accept people into their life, is the article all about.
Man (No offense here. I mean both man and woman. I could have used human, then I would have sounded more like an anthropologist referring to some Dinosaur. So, I am sticking to man) is a social being. Being social beings, relationships with one another is important. That's why we have so many books on how to nurture it and many Bollywood songs are based on it. Every year the television schedules are packed with film awards given away in recognition of good depiction of human relationships in filmdom, in almost every country, in almost every language. I am mystified at many kinds of relationships around us. Below is my view on them
It's been around seven months since I started working for an MNC. I've attended many birthday parties which are pompous in nature compared to the farewells which are very solemn, with few people shedding a tear. People share their experiences on working with the person. I recently had the opportunity to narrate my work experience of just 3 months with my team mate around some big wigs of my department. It's been a month since he left.
Every year during the death anniversary of my grand mother, I've seen my mum's eyes. They turn bright red, brimming with tears. Unable to see her face, I look away. A month back, I saw my fellow colleague shedding tears at her beloved colleague whom she had worked with for a year (these days a project can last up to an year or two). The first case is justified. My mum misses her mother, her parent who brought her up. The second case mystifies me. How can spending 10 hours with someone per day, only on weekdays for a year bring up so many tears ?? I don't know.
At company interviews, team work is stressed. Team work not only means working together with everyone in a cordial manner, it also means to let go of old relations and get along with new team mates.
Coming to friendship, the need for friends changes as years go by. At kindergarten level, friends meant sharing each others toys. At high school level, friends meant holding each others hands and discussing about the fluctuating hormone levels. At graduation level, friends meant throwing brick bats at lecturers. At work place, friends means 'survival' . Here friends translate to cordial relations with team mates, colleagues, cafeteria mates, bus mates and so on.
Then there is the mysterious case of people who elope. Death of a spouse can also be branded as a break up. Breaking up with some one we know for a long time is hard to digest. It can lead to solitude for some days. Some how, it's hard to believe that we can find another person who can like us to the same capacity as the one who just departed from our lives.
The first thing we do when meet a person is judge them by their looks. In India, as soon as we get to know a person's name, we calculate his religious background. Then we quiz about each others family and economic background. Our mental calculation digs deeper. Based on our bringing-up we decide whether or not to maintain the relationship.
Most of us are extremely stereotyped and judgmental. We keep friends only if they have our mind sets, only if they belong to our religion. After a certain age, we would have built many brick walls around us cemented together by our 'racial' thoughts.
Why build walls? Why waste all our energy into it? Mother Teresa herself said, 'If you go on judging people all your life, you will have no time to love them'. Why not inculcate this into our lives? Our education system needs to be blamed. We only literally read and mug facts. We hardly care to apply it practically into our lives.