My wrists were raw from how hard I'd struggled against Lazarus' tight knots. The burns he'd given me from opening the blinds were long gone, but it still stung a little to move too much. I sank my teeth into the pillow nearest me a few times, trying to dispel my need to tear someone apart. Inwardly, I cursed myself. I'd felt it coming on, and I'd done nothing to stop myself. The part of me that wasn't focussed on my consuming bloodlust hoped I hadn't done anything too bad to Fate. I wasn't too worried about Lazarus - he was used to this now. After ten years of dealing with this from me, he had to be.
I could hear his light snores and sleeping whimpers as he dreamed in the other room, and did my best to not notice the smell of his blood trying to draw me out of the room. Not that I could've gotten out if I wanted to. He'd tied me well enough that I couldn't snap the ropes like this, or get them loose.
Sometime during the night, I heard Lazarus wake up and start moving around. He opened the door and walked over to me, sitting on the bed beside me.
"I'm sorry," he sighed, pushing my hair back away from my face, his eyes echoing his words.
"You say that every time this happens," I grumbled.
"I know. But I never stop being sorry for what I've done to you." I snapped my teeth at his wrist and he withdrew his hand. I was hungry and drained, and flopped my head down into the bloodied sheets, groaning softly. He untied me and I pushed myself up, noticing Fate hovering in the doorway, watching us. Lazarus pulled his hair back to bare his neck to me, and I bit into him gratefully, squeezing his hand as he took mine.
I healed him when I was done and looked up at Fate, feeling kind of embarrassed that I'd lost it with him. He just looked at the floor. "I'm sorry I flipped out, Fate." He didn't say anything, and I licked my lips nervously. "I saw it coming, and I couldn't stop myself. I didn't mean to hurt you..." He sort of shuffled behind Lazarus, and I sighed, looking down at my hands in my lap.
"No more ropes," he mumbled.
"No more ropes," I agreed with a nod. He took Lazarus' hand, and I watched as he squeezed it gently. I felt him watching me, but I was just staring at the floor, feeling thoroughly ashamed of myself. "I really am sorry, Fate," I pretty much whispered, but I knew he'd hear anyway.
"S'okay," he replied just as quietly. I didn't know what else to say. Sensing me beginning to feel more and more awkward, Lazarus put his hand on Fate's shoulder and started steering him towards the living room.
"C'mon, I'll get you another hot chocolate." He didn't say anything, and I sort of fell back onto the bed, staring blankly at the ceiling. I stayed there for a couple of hours, watching Fate following Lazarus around like a lost sheep. Lazarus had been playing the piano, and while it was keeping me calm, I still wasn't feeling too great about what had happened. I hauled myself up off the bed and into the kitchen to make myself a coffee. Fate watched me as I made it, and while I drank it sitting on the counter.
"I'm going out," I announced when I was done with my coffee.
"Where?" Fate asked quietly.
"To sulk," Lazarus answered before I could even open my mouth. Fate prodded the bite on his hip as I glared at the blonde one a little. Asshole. He kept prodding the bite, but stopped when I watched him kinda curiously.
"What?" his voice was still really quiet. I didn't like it. I wanted to hug him, but I was too awkward to be able to tell if it'd make him feel better or worse. So I shrugged, and flew out of the apartment, hitting the streets running. Maybe I'd stay out til the morning, and give myself the punishment I really deserved for it.
I shook my head. That was stupid. It happens, and I just had to get over it that I'd hurt someone I really didn't want to. So instead of sitting in the park and waiting for the sun to dish out my punishment, I hit a couple bars and got wasted instead.