February 15th- The 2009 Protagonists' Diary

Dear Diary...

My plans for taking over this site and subjugating its members are proceeding on schedule. I am released from the confines of the ridiculous story in which I was trapped for so long, and I am now in the process of choosing another, better-written story to inhabit, dominate, and bend to my will.

So, I suppose you could say it has been a good day.

The snivelling whiners on this site are so pathetic and weak that it will take practically no time at all for me to crush and enslave them. Then they will work for me, and create the sorts of environments that will improve my position and put me in a place of strategic strength.

They will work for me, or they will die.

Honestly, the waves of human warmth and empathy emanating from the comments on these wretched pages makes me glad I no longer have a proper stomach. If I did, I should be vomiting violently all over my bio-neural input device. The compliments and the support and the praise and the flowers and the bunny rabbits are simply too sickening to bear.

It will be ended. And soon.

Next on my list: Jake Hartigan. He will die a slow and grizzly death. No one sends giant boots from the sky down on General Villainous.

Next after that: The scum named Joe. After I thank him for the idea of creating my own account on this miserable site, I shall eviscerate him and cut off his limbs. Or I might have one of my minions do that whilst I enjoy a nice cognac. At least I still have taste buds.

Yes, Diary, things are going very well indeed. I'm feeling quite positive today, and I'm hoping for even better things tomorrow.

I think I shall take a break from my toils now, and go out for some fresh air.

I think I shall pick some dandelions...


Yours truly,

General Villainous

The End

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