I sigh pushing a hand back through my hair. How can I trust her? She's denied me so many times and I understand why but... she cant just keep playing me this way. I slump to the floor. "I....I can't, Natalie"
"You can't..?" she whispers her voice cracking.
"I can't go into this when you're continuely pushing me away. Its like your playing me. Trying to gain my affection then shoving it back in my face" I whisper not able to look at her. I notice Natalie lower her head and I sigh heavily. "I don't know what you want from me"
Natalie falls quiet with me and for a while we just sit in silence. "Please" she whispers softly. "I'm serious when I say you're special. Seriously, Ash. I... I just need time"
I look up at her into her eyes and see the honesty and a slight lie. Am I willing to risk it?
"No" I say. She looks at me with wide pain filled eyes. "I'm not special. You're wrong. I'm an idiot. I've messed up so many things in my life"
I reach out and grasp her wrist. I pull her into my lap. She gasps beginning to squirm but I just hold her tighter. "Ash.. Please..."
"No, Natalie. This... This is innocent. I'm not letting you go" I whisper. Natalie open her mouth but I continue. "Please, Natalie. Just relax"
And she does and soon Natalie has fallen asleep. I look down at her and see how innocent she looks as she sleeps. I can't help but smile as a tiredness sweeps over me as well.