Why do I try to hide it? I don't understand why. I mean, I love Him don't I? He's my God. So why do I act so ashamed of Him? I shouldn't be. There's nothing to be ashamed of. He's my God, and I love Him. I mean, maybe I feel like people won't take me seriously if I have a God. But in the end, what am I here for? I'm here to bring people to Him.
Of course, there's nothing wrong with having a little fiction. Or a lot of fiction, in my case. Haha. :) But sometimes I just get caught up in all the fiction and say (or write as the case may be) dumb things. And it irritates me when I read it over. I read it and ask myself, "What have I become?"
Maybe I'm overreacting. Maybe I'm reading into this too much. I probably am - but I can't help but feel that I'm right. I'm letting sin take over my life.
Now, you atheists/agnostics are probably thinking: Oh great, this guy is a religious nutcase. And usually, I'd try to defend myself, but you know what? I am a religious nutcase. I believe in God, whether or not everyone likes it. That's who I am. A guy who loves God, even more than he loves fiction. Even though he loves fiction so much.
This is probably giving you a strange new dimension of me. Maybe a dimension you didn't want. Maybe you liked to think of me as the kind of guy who didn't have a religion. Maybe you didn't care at all, and once again, I'm reading into this too much. But in the end, it all comes down to this:
I'm a religious nutcase that loves fiction. Some people think that you can't combine that stuff, but I am that combination. I love fiction, I love movies, I love comic books, I love video games (even the violent ones;), I love to take walks and just read detective fiction, sometimes I really don't want to go to church, sometimes I say really mean things and hurt people, but I'm still a Christian. A strong one. I strongly believe in a God that loves everyone in this world.
Whether you like it or not, I believe there's a God sitting right behind you right now, pleading for you to believe in Him too. If I can ever do anything to help you, I totally will.
Or if you just need a friend, I'm there.
Or if you just want someone to write some totally awesome detective fiction with, I'm there for you in that area too. :)
This kind of reminds me of that "Lean on Me" song. I forget who it's by. I'll probably post this and then look it up. Maybe even listen to the Chorus once or something.
Anyway, I guess the lyrics to that song sum it up best:
Lean on me, when you're not strong
And I'll be your friend
I'll help you carry on
For it won't be long
'Til I'm gonna need
Somebody to lean on