My heart was screaming at me as I flew away from Lye’s arms. Tears ran down my face and I flew blindly into my camp. What did I do? I stared at my reflection in the river still sobbing. I felt broken. In my mind, I was content. I avoided to boy. I didn’t accept his hug. That was right? Right? But why did I feel so upset?
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.
Calm down Avie. Crying won’t help you.
I sat up and arranged myself, but I couldn’t hide the pain in my heart.
Seeing other avians felt much more like a curse now. I bent my head down and my hand touched my pendant when a thought flashed through my mind. And I realized what the problem was. After years of torture and pain, I finally realized that my heart was broken. Completely shattered into the smallest pieces and was only held together by the barest thread. My mind hid it from me building up defenses thicker than brick walls. And now today, I just strengthen and broke that thread in the same hour. My world was shattered and now, for the first time, the defenses I put up in my mind were starting to weaken. Reality was striking back.
“Do you love me?”
“Then kiss me.”
The memory rang softly in the back of my head. Matt. The only person that had ever been nice to me. The only person I fell in love with. He was murdered. His entire family was murdered. Gone. Forever.
“Drive me to the bar!”
Jack. I hissed in disgust as the voice and shook my head, wipe to thought from my mind.
I curled up silently into a ball and rocked back and forth as I tried to sort out my feelings, but all I could think about was that Lye kid when he stepped over and shooed away Jack. I bursted out into tears again. Why did they feel so familiar?
Go to sleep little girl. Tomorrow you’re 18. Something has to change.
I settled myself by the river and nodded off. Yes. Tomorrow, I’ll be 18. Something has to change.